The Dating Couple

While driving around earlier today, we were behind a police officer for about a mile. This is no big deal, he was going the same way we were, but then suddenly turned off. I realized that it was because he had reached the Jefferson/Orleans Parish lines but what if that hadn’t been the reason?

What if, we made him nervous and he decided to turn because of us. I posed the simple question to Jonathan “Do you ever wonder if cops get nervous when we follow them like we do when they follow us?” He thought for a moment and then his eyes lit up. “I want to try it” is all he said.

So, the rest of the ride home was devising how we would do it. First, we would need to get a very recognizable car, think traffic cone orange. Then we would need to spot a cop and just start following him around for a little while. Finally, we could record our little experiment and document the cops reactions.

There was some silliness about if they tried to pull us, following them and telling them that we were following them first. Think, Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd running in circles around a tree. We had a good laugh and continued home.

At Burger King for lunch, we talked about the very pretty and curvy girl who came in. Things were kept light throughout most of the day.

Then towards evening, things took a more serious tone. We started talking about infidelity in relation to that might be the only reason we would have a messy split if it ever came to that. However, we started discussing what we would and would not be comfortable with in different situations.

Jonathan gave me the green light to sleep with whomever I want years ago. I’ve never taken him up on that. I don’t think he would have said it if he thought that I would have jumped at the chance to sleep with another guy/girl without him. I could be wrong, but that’s the conclusion I reached.

So, since his point on the issue was well known, we discussed how and when it would be okay for him to be with someone else without me. I came to the conclusion that I could understand if we were going to be apart for a while on business and what not allowing each of us to do our own thing.

However, I also realized that I wouldn’t want that thing to be with any pre-meditation. Meaning, I wouldn’t want him to meet someone who he had gotten to know on the internet/phone or wherever without me. I would be much more willing to accept a possible infidelity if it were a “spur of the moment just sex” sort of thing instead of a “I’m sleeping with someone that I have feelings for and you’re not here” sort of thing.

He doesn’t understand this viewpoint, but I’m sure someone out there will be able to see my side of it. This discussion led to one about polyamory and what it means for us and other couples.

Jonathan pointed out that many polyamorous couples enjoy relationships outside of their own. While this is great for them, it’s not what I want for myself. I don’t expect our girlfriends to develop feelings for us at the same rate, nor do I doubt that there has and will be favoritism on their part towards one of us.

However the thought of either of us falling in love with someone else and having that relationship on the side scares and intrigues me. I would be afraid that that sort of relationship would deter from my current one with Jonathan. I would be afraid that he would choose the other woman over me especially if she decides to be monogamous with him.

In those types of relationships, I wonder if the extra partners are monogamous to the couple or if they have other partners outside of the relationship with the person in the couple.

We both know that these kinds of discussions are loosing battles. When it comes down to it there is no way to predict how we will react in different situations. There is also no way to tell what the future holds for our relationship.

I’m just glad that we have open communication where we can talk about anything and everything in a calm and rational manner most of the time. That ability to have conversations about absolutely anything is probably the things I cherish most about our relationship. Whether it’s making cops feel awkward, or the future of our relationship, I know that we’ll always be there for each other to discuss whatever arises. In the end, that’s what makes us such a great couple.