The Dating Couple

As I mentioned before, I’m not a small woman. However, I wouldn’t look right really thin either. Coming to that conclusion and being comfortable with my size has taken a long time. Yes, there are still days that I wish I were lighter but they are much fewer and farther between than in the past.

I first started having problems with my weight in middle school. I had abnormal periods and was put on birth control. I think that that was the start of the screwing up of my metabolism. After starting the pill I gained a little weight. I was a size 16 and was picked on by all the kids in school not only for my size, but also my anti-social nature.

Continue reading ‘Weight Battle’

While driving around earlier today, we were behind a police officer for about a mile. This is no big deal, he was going the same way we were, but then suddenly turned off. I realized that it was because he had reached the Jefferson/Orleans Parish lines but what if that hadn’t been the reason?

What if, we made him nervous and he decided to turn because of us. I posed the simple question to Jonathan “Do you ever wonder if cops get nervous when we follow them like we do when they follow us?” He thought for a moment and then his eyes lit up. “I want to try it” is all he said.

So, the rest of the ride home was devising how we would do it. First, we would need to get a very recognizable car, think traffic cone orange. Then we would need to spot a cop and just start following him around for a little while. Finally, we could record our little experiment and document the cops reactions.

There was some silliness about if they tried to pull us, following them and telling them that we were following them first. Think, Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd running in circles around a tree. We had a good laugh and continued home.

Continue reading ‘Conversations’

I’ll step up and admit. I love it when I get quality alone time.

Studies seem to agree with me. They show that, no matter how satisfied with your sex life you are, you probably still masturbate at least occasionally.

Crystal is easily the best lover that I’ve had. We’re also a very sexual couple, even after seven years of being together. We have sex an average of 5-6 times per week, more on some weeks, less on others. That is more than enough to satisfy, but still, every once in a while, I just want to shut the door and be my own partner for the evening. It’s not a common thing, but it happens regularly enough.

To take things a step further, this desire continued even while we had a (practically) live in girlfriend. Though two gorgeous women were around, both very sexual and fun, sometimes I just wanted it to be about me. Once again, it wasn’t an all-the-time thing, it wasn’t even frequent, but it was still there.

Frankly, I don’t see it going away either.

Continue reading ‘Good Masturbations’

My fellow men, we need to talk. There’s been an elephant in the room for far too long. For decades now women have, justifiably, been talking about how societal pressures have made them feel insecure and driven them to often insane lengths. It’s a real problem and it needs to be addressed.

However, as men, we’re not all that different. We see pictures of Chippendale dancers and feel that twinge of inadequacy. Sure, we put on a brave face, but we notice the pudges, blemishes and stray hairs the same as women. We diet, exercise, buy protein shakes and generally do whatever it takes to get that “ideal” body. Manorexia is becoming more common and whole stores are dedicated to us getting in shape, whatever that really is.

For me, the insecurity is the lack of weight. At 6’0 and 165, I’m a very thin person. I find it impossible to build muscle, no matter how much I work out, and it reminds me of the nerd I was in high school, no matter how much I’ve changed in other ways. For other men, it is the beer gut or the hairy back and the list goes on and on of male insecurities.

But the worst area for many deals with something more intimate. The penis. Years of watching porn stars with monster dongs have skewed our perception about our dicks and the size they’re supposed to be. You’ll be hard pressed to find a guy that hasn’t looked at their member and not wished it to be at least a little bit bigger. Even I’ll admit to that.

What do we do? We stock up Enzyte, go through surgery, buy pumps and inject ourselves with gel. If it sounds familiar, it’s because it’s the same type of things women do in their quest to become more attractive and it has to stop, on both sides.

The reason is that most of what we’ve been fed about penis size is pure bullshit and I’m pretty sure that, if you ask your girlfriend or wife she’ll agree.

Continue reading ‘Penis Size’

Spring is almost upon us. That means department stores are already gearing up for the summer months and are putting out some of their warmer weather merchandise.

With that comes one of our favorite time-wasters for when we’re trudging around the hallowed halls of our local Wal-Mart, Target or other retailer. It’s a simple, but fun game that anyone can play.

If you have a few moments while in one of these gigantic retailers, make your way over to the area with the above-ground swimming pools. There, take a close look at the photos on the boxes, you’ll notice something very strange about all of the “families” they feature.

The moms are always really hot.

Continue reading ‘Hot Pool Moms’

With our recent visit to the local lesbian bar such a wonderful success, it seems logical to talk about one of the stranger paradoxes of the situation, the fact that I went along.

After all, there are very few places that men are not supposed to go, women’s locker rooms, bathrooms and gyms to name a few. A lesbian bar seems to be equally contradictory. It’s a bar for lesbians. Lesbians are women, therefore, no men should be allowed.

However, that obviously isn’t the case and, at most lesbian bars, there are at least a few men to be found. This doesn’t mean that men have an easy time of it there. There are many pitfalls and acceptance isn’t easy.

Still, it can be done if men just follow some basic, and sensible advice.

Continue reading ‘Men in Lesbian Bars’

There are a lot of people who say that abstinence is the only safe option for teens. However, they don’t tell them about masturbation, contraceptives, or many of the other options available. Since this is such a big deal in today’s society, I thought I would tell my own story and give the reason why I am so against abstinence being forced on today’s youth.

Dictionary.com defines a virgin with several different definitions. However, the first one listed is the one we will focus on:

a person who has never had sexual intercourse.

The website then goes on to describe virginity in several ways including:

the state or condition of being pure, fresh, or unused.

Abstaining from sex, and choosing to remain a virgin is a fine choice for a teen. However, it should be just that, a choice. Most teens are just told to say no to sex, they aren’t given the information they need to make their own decision about whether or not to abstain.

Also, if a teen comes from a religious background, like I did, then there are added pressures from above. Here is my story of not only how I lost my virginity, but also the reasons why I waited until I was 21 to do so and the consequences that followed.

Continue reading ‘Losing My Virginity’

The other day at work, a male co-worker mentioned having porn. Two other ladies in the room were immediately disgusted by this idea and swore that if their husbands ever looked at pornography that they would “throw them out on their asses.” I sat quietly and listened to their conversation. The guy, “F” thought that all men had at least a magazine or two hidden from their wives and the wives of course denied this and just reeled at the thought.

I went up to “F” shortly after the conversation and let him know that I agreed with him that porn is not a horrible thing and that most men do look at it. One of the wives was my boss, so I didn’t want to tick her off at me when I was trying to get hired on permanently. He appreciated the support. For the rest of the day, I wondered, what was it that got these women so angry at the thought of their husband having or looking at porn. Then I came to two realizations.

• One: The women were not upset about the people in porn, they were upset that their husband’s might be hiding the fact that they look at it.

• Two: Some straight women don’t understand porn period

Continue reading ‘Porn: Why most women just don’t get it.’

Growing up I remember hearing about the famed “seven-year itch”. Supposedly, after you’ve been with the same woman for seven years, you’re supposed to get this burning desire to sleep around, taste other fruits or just and generally fuck anything that moves other than your significant other.

However, Crystal and I just hit our seven year mark and, right now, I don’t feel any such overwhelming urge. We were a monogomous couple for two years and have been a polyamorous one for the most recent five, It’s been a wonderful relationship, one where she never ceases to amaze me, and all I can think is how much I look forward to what tomorrow brings.

Continue reading ‘What Seven-Year Itch?’

According to most men, I’m the luckiest guy on earth. My significant other is a bisexual, a true bisexual. She and I share women, have threesomes and do all of the things guys are supposed to do with their bisexual girlfriends. She lets me share, watch and even have fun on my own if she knows and trusts the girl.

However, life with a bisexual is no porn novel. At times it isn’t even easy. It’s not something that gets switched on every weekend and turned off on Monday morning. It’s an every day thing, something to live with 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

Most of the guys out there dreaming about dating a bi girl probably need a cold shower. The threesome fantasy is fine and good, but living with and loving one is often times a whole other matter.

Continue reading ‘Dating a Bisexual: Nothing Like the Fantasies’